michaelsrainbowhair:

when someone asks you what your favorite band is then insults them

fangirls-and5secondsoffanfiction:

more like 5 seconds of holy fuck you’re hot

theboyfriends:

religion: 

image

(via paynesticks)

sluttyoliveoil:

once my friend was waiting for her mom to pick her up and she called her mom and her mom said “im on my way, the traffic is just slow, im coming” and my friend went “mom i called the house phone”

(via fake-mermaid)

me: walks into living room
tv: tonight on how its made
me: stands in same spot for 30 minutes watching how garbage bags are made

mistressmaryd:

seifukucat:

[walks into pet store puppy area wearing a huge coat]

[shuffles quickly out of pet store in a much tighter fitting coat]

image

(via palmist)

unclefather:

40ft:

If u think bendy cucumber is hot you are not welcome on this blog unsub or I’m calling the police

banjo kazooie is cute

watching porn
while you're horny: YOOOOOO
after you cum: ew
"You need someone who goes out of their way to make it obvious that they want you in their life." - Unknown (via psych-facts)

(via annnierose)

ninfia:

im going to inject garlic bread into my blood stream 

(Source: fruitpacks, via promiseswecantkeep)

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